Arrival

It must be said that he was a very punctual baby. Stroke of midnight on his due date, and the contractions started. The whole labor lasted about four hours; he crowned on the first push and came out on the second. This makes it sound like no big deal, or as my mom puts it, like I went and laid an egg. D, bolstered by the speed of it all and the ease of the baby’s temperament, has dared to say the word “third.”

Though faster, labor felt grittier this time around. I think there was a part of myself the first time that I reserved for wonder; a part of my mind was always on the side thinking, “oh my, how curious,” and it allowed me to embrace the worst times with a sort of hopeful generosity.

Labor this time felt more like digging my toes in the dirt and wishing the whole thing would be over. I had definitely forgotten how painful it was, or maybe my body didn’t have time to acclimate to the continuous wave of contractions at the end before it was all over. At one point the nurse had to remind me to open my legs to let the baby out and I all I could think was, but it hurts more that way; I had no idea he was at the time just a few pushes away.

They laid him right on me afterwards this time, still slick and slimy and blue. It was marvelous and surreal, though the entire time I was distracted by the sensation that I could feel every stitch they were putting in down below. That’s how these first few days have been: marveling at him, griping about the recovery. Everything is marginally better than it was the first time around, but that isn’t to say it’s any more pleasant having engorged breasts or soreness that makes you wonder if you’ll ever sit normally again. There’s nothing worse than desperately wanting your old body back only to realize you’ve become a relative invalid with a floppy belly to boot.

But he is something else. Our first was not exactly an easy newborn, and now we are all amazement. He actually likes car seats! He can go out in public without crying constantly! He can fall asleep on his own in the crib! He actually sleeps! Best of all, he doesn’t require total silence to nurse or stay asleep as she did, which is convenient since E has been obsessed with never being parted from his side, which involves playing and singing loudly next to his crib while he naps.

So here we are, the four of us. That has a nice ring to it.